This is the part when I can fully attest how fast time really flies. It feels like it was just yesterday when I was struggling with my clinical duties in college; a few days later, I was on the line of applying for different hospitals and institutions as an official registered nurse; months after, I finally got in as a Hemodialysis Nurse; NOW I’m 30!
While I’m told that I still have the face, energy and the maturity of an 18-year-old, I’d come to realize that in some points of your life, you’d just be surprised that you’ll come prepared for whatever life throws at you.
Now that I’m 30, I’d like to sum up my past three decades with a bible verse:
Ecclesiastes 3:1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens
I’m not that mature yet to accept and learn failure easily at an earlier age
I can still fully remember the time when I was waiting for the NLE results. I was ecstatic the time I found out I was finally a Registered Nurse. Days after when I try to get the percentage of my score, I almost flipped from my chair because I got the exact 75% passing score–no more no less. From that time then, I was convinced that God really wanted me to become a nurse. It was really my time to be an RN. He knew that if I failed that time, I wouldn’t be where I am right now. He knew that I’m not that mature yet to accept and learn failure easily at an earlier age.
That unlike from what I was used in the College of Nursing, life doesn’t hand me a syllabus…
I guess the following years after that, God saw that I was ready enough to see what life really is. That unlike from what I was used in the College of Nursing, life doesn’t hand me a syllabus that right after I finally become a Registered Nurse, I’d easily get in a hospital and work as a staff nurse. And that took me 5 years to be a staff nurse. That then, was really my time to be a staff nurse.
That life isn’t comparable or as closely similar to College life when it’s all about scores…
That life isn’t comparable or as closely similar to College life when it’s all about scores and passing all subjects in one take even the board exam. There will always be failures and how I stood up, tried again, time after time is what matters after all and not anymore the score. I failed the IELTS exam thrice. The first was on the year 2013 while the other two was taken in the same year, February and August 2017. I didn’t anymore take another but little did I know that God has other plans for me, somewhat signalling me to stop because my last IELTS exam expired last August 2019, 3 months after I started my US visa screening which means, I was able to make use of it. If I hadn’t taken that third exam, I should have taken again another IELTS and endure the whole difficult process all over.
That life isn’t always about giving up for your dreams, rather holding on what’s dear and what’s really significant–my nursing career.
When I knew that I couldn’t get the chance of approval for my request of NCLEX study leave on the dates the 20-day intensive review was offered, I was this close to resigning. But the works of God can sometimes be too powerful when there was an announcement that there will be a Saturday NCLEX intensive review. Although, it was cut short, there was again another announcement for another schedule for 20-day NCLEX Intensive Review on November, which I was able to get my 2 weeks study leave approved. If I did resign that time, I wouldn’t be in my position right now running as the current Officer in Charge in the Hemodialysis Unit.
That at some point of life, there will come a time when you’re too busy chasing your dreams and you’re slowly losing the passion.
The year after I had my 2-weeks study leave, I once again applied for an NCLEX 35 days leave to fully prepare and ace the exam. In just that span of 35 days, I was already thinking of what life would be right after I pass the exam. That finally, I’d soon leave the toxic nursing environment in the Philippines. God must have heard me. So even after having the 35 days leave, enrolling in a 20-day-Intensive NCLEX review and finishing the whole book of Saunders and the whole question bank of Uworld, I FAILED! Still, I didn’t give up.
So, I promised myself that I’ll never do all the things I did the last time which led to a failed NCLEX. I didn’t enroll in a review center, I didn’t apply for a leave, I only did self study with Uworld and Mark Klimek. My co-workmates didn’t even know I was taking the NCLEX again, all they know was that I was going somewhere to attend a special wedding. Plus, I had an oncall the day before and finished the morning after, hours before I flew to Manila. Hours before the exam, I took Uworld assessment test and got a low chance of passing score with only at 27th percentile. But I just said,
Lord, I offer this day to you!
The day I took the exam was also the day of going back to my hometown. So, just imagine I was already bringing my luggage during the exam. As soon as the time started, you wouldn’t believe that most questions I got were similar from the assessment test I took in Uworld hours earlier. It stopped at 75. I did the PVT inside Tim Horton’s and I couldn’t contain my feelings after I saw the good pop up. All my sacrifices had finally paid off. I couldn’t let my tears fully flow because there are a lot of people inside the cafe.
Ecclesiastes 3:11 He has made everything beautiful in its time.
Ecclesiastes 3:11 He has made everything beautiful in its time.
Now, I finally knew what God was trying to tell me. I was too busy chasing my dream of working abroad, to finally get the paycheck I deserve but I was at the same time forgetting the basic reasons behind being a nurse–passion and service. I needed that failure to appreciate again my career. To go back from square one just to bring back the passion I had when I was still in College. How I created this platform, nursegermz.com in inspiring other nurses as I take them in my nursing career. This time around, I know God wants to show me another way to see, perceive and appreciate all the more my nursing career through my current position as an officer in Charge in the Hemodialysis Unit. Whatever your plans Lord, make me an instrument.
Where Am I in my Nursing Career, Now that I am 30?
I’m Germeline Joy R. Nabua, RN, CNN, USRN. Thirty years. Three years as a Hemodialysis Nurse and currently, the Officer in Charge of the unit.